Saturday, October 17, 2009

Don't expect instant change

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Sometimes parents who learn more effective principles of child rearing and change their methods are perplexed when there is not an instant improvement in behavior. Perhaps a child has been belligerent or withdrawn , or has been lying or stealing. The fact that the parents have ceased their accusations, or have substituted praise for censure, is no guarantee that the child's personality is going to be altered immediately. Just as it traits, it will take time for him or her to relate to parents who have changed their approach.
When you know that your child failed a test, do not ask, "Did you pass your exams? Are you sure? Lying won't help. Some parents deliberately ask such questions to see if a child will tell the truth--to teach him honestly. Instead, state, Your school informed us that you failed the test. We are worried. We wonder how to be of help. "Convey to your children that there is no need to lie. You are prepared to listen to bitter as well as pleasant truths.

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